MTV Madness

I have never been a fan of MTV or award shows really, so it should be no surprise that the combination of the two – MTV award shows would not be something I was a fan of. For some reason in particular, this year’s MTV Movie Award nominees have particularly angered me. One thing that stands out is Twilight’s SEVEN awards, sure the movie made a shitload of money and has a fanatic teen following, but the movie was a disappointment across the board – acting, writing, action and here it sits, but lets look at all the categories.

Best Movie
The Dark Knight
High School Musical 3: Senior Year
Iron Man
Slumdog Millionaire
Twilight

Three of these movies are really good, one is a disappointment, but one is a travesty. You realize they put The Dark Knight and High School Musical 3 in the same category, as near equals? I’m not going to say anymore. MY PICK: Slumdog Millionaire. WHO WILL WIN: The Dark Knight.

Best Male Performance
Christian Bale (The Dark Knight)
Vin Diesel (Fast & Furious)
Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man)
Zac Efron (High School Musical 3: Senior Year)
Shia LaBeouf (Eagle Eye)

Bale and Downey were amazing (of course) but the rest of these hacks are definitely outclassed. Vin Diesel is struggling to get back into character, Efron is struggling to get out of character, and Shia LaBeouf doesn’t even have a character. As a point of clarification I meant that Eagle Eye sucked – A LOT. MY PICK: Robert Downey Jr. WHO WILL WIN: Christian Bale.

Best Female Performance
Anne Hathaway (Bride Wars)
Taraji P. Henson (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
Angelina Jolie (Wanted)
Kristen Stewart (Twilight)
Kate Winslet (The Reader)

The selection of these nominees is even more confusing than their male counterparts. Hathaway’s nod here is more of a slap in the face considering her performance in Rachel Getting Married while Henson’s performance was okay but seems well short of the “Best Performance” level. Jolie’s nomination reminds me of LaBeouf’s nom in Eagle Eye – both Wanted and Eagle Eye sucked – and did not have any performances that were even “adequate.” Winselt’s performance doesn’t need much comment here – she was great. Kristen Stewart was the one bright spot in a disappointing movie – but was it the best performance of the year? Was she better than Winslet? MY PICK: Kate Winslet. WHO WILL WIN: Kristen Stewart.

Breakthrough Performance – Male
Ben Barnes (The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian)
Taylor Lautner (Twilight)
Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire)
Robert Pattinson (Twilight)
Bobb’e J. Thompson (Role Models)

This category is “better” only in the sense that there are two noms I like – Dev Patel, who did a great job and truly “broke out,” and Bobb’e J. Thompson, whose role in Role Models was not only hysterical but also probably opened a lot of doors for him. Two noms for Twilight is a little disappointing – I had to look up who Taylor Lautner’s character was (Jacob) and then scratch my head about his screen time. MY PICK: Dev Patel. WHO WILL WIN: Robert Pattinson.

Breakthrough Performance – Female
Miley Cyrus (Hannah Montana: The Movie)
Kat Dennings (Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playllist)
Vanessa Hudgens (High School Musical 3: Senior Year)
Freida Pinto (Slumdog Millionaire)
Amanda Seyfried (Mamma Mia!)
Ashley Tisdale (High School Musical 3: Senior Year)

I think this category has the most competition. The High School Musical 3 noms confuse me because it would seem like the third time around these Disney-made actors do not have much “breaking out to do.” If you’re in the public consciousness enough to have sex tapes and racy photos, you probably don’t need “breakout performances.” Same goes for Miley Cyrus considering she has a show that already helped her “breajout”. That aside, I love the other nominees – I’ve been a big fan of Kat Dennings since Charlie Bartlett (so much so that I forgave her for The House Bunny). Frieda Pinto is obviously gorgeous and did a great job and Amanda Seyfried really did break out – showing she had talent beyond her Mean Girls-glazed eyes looked. MY PICK: Kat Dennings. WHO WILL WIN: Miley Cyrus.

Best Comedic Performance
Steve Carrell (Get Smart)
Jim Carrey (Yes Man)
Anna Faris (The House Bunny)
James Franco (Pineapple Express)
Amy Poehler (Baby Mama)

I think all of these actors are generally funny and generally pretty good actors but their performances came in movies that ranged from laughless (The House Bunny) to downright painful (Baby Mama). While Pineapple Express was entertaining, it was not all that funny. There was one that stood above the rest – Steve Carrell in Get Smart – a movie that exceeded expectations across the board. MY PICK: Steve Carrell. WHO WILL WIN: James Franco.

Best Villain
Luke Goss (Hellboy II: The Golden Army)
Dwayne Johnson (Get Smart)
Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight)
Derek Mears (Friday the 13th)
Johnathon Schaech (Prom Night)

I don’t know a hell of a lot about most of these flicks because I never really had extra cash I wanted to burn by seeing Friday the 13th and Prom Night but I don’t think this matters because I would be shocked if Ledger lost. MY PICK: Heath Ledger. WHO WILL WIN: Heath Ledger.

Best Fight
Bride Wars
The Dark Knight
Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Pineapple Express
Twilight

This category gives me the most problem because I have very little idea what people are going for here. If you like cat fights it’s kind of tough to beat Bride Wars but if you want true action scenes The Dark Knight and Hellboy II are going to stand above the rest. Pineapple Express’ scene was pretty funny and pretty good in a general sense, but not a hell of a lot that really stays with you. Twilight on the other hand showed that if the scene sucked in the book, it will suck even more in the movie. MY PICK: The Dark Knight. WHO WILL WIN: Twilight, maybe?

Best Kiss
High School Musical 3: Senior Year (Zac Efron/Vanessa Hudgens)
I Love You, Man (Paul Rudd/Thomas Lennon)
Milk (Sean Penn/James Franco)
Slumdog Millionaire (Dev Patel/Freida Pinto)
Twilight (Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson)

Milk stands out for it’s political statement, which gives it a slight edge over some teenie favorites like HSM3 and Twilight. Frankly the Twilight kiss wasn’t much to write home about – much like the rest. Slumdog Millionaire’s kiss was something special – it sent shivers down my spine and was the perfect climax to a great movie. MY PICK: Slumdog Millionaire (Dev Patel/Freida Pinto). WHO WILL WIN: Milk (Sean Penn/James Franco).

Best WTF Moment
Baby Mama (Peeing in the Sink)
Forgetting Sarah Marshall (Naked Break-up)
Slumdog Millionaire (Jumping in the Poop Shed)
Tropic Thunder (Tasting the Decapitated Head)
Wanted (Curved Bullet Kill)

While this category seems the least “legit” to me it also seems the closest category. Peeing in the sink might be the best part of Baby Mama, the naked break-up defines FSM just as the curved bullet defines Wanted, the poop shed sets the course for Slumdog and the decapitated head makes you realize just how far over the line Tropic Thunder has gone. MY PICK: Forgetting Sarah Marshall (Naked Break-up). WHO WILL WIN: Baby Mama (Peeing in the Sink).

Best Song From a Movie
Hannah Montana: The Movie (Miley Cyrus’ The Climb)
Slumdog Millionaire (A.R. Rahman’s Jai Ho)
Twilight (Paramore’s Decode)
The Wrestler (Bruce Springsteen’s The Wrestler)

These choices cross lots of genres and lots of generations. I loved all of Slumdog’s music but Jai Ho was not the song that spoke to me, kind of like how I like Paramore a lot of times but not Decode. I don’t really want to talk about Miley but Springsteen’s The Wrestler blew me away. I don’t usually like the Boss, but this song was so perfect for the film. MY PICK: The Wrestler. WHO WILL WIN: The Climb.

To sum up: Twilight is overrated, each of the categories have one legit nominee, and the lesser qualified person will probably win.